8 Tips on how to Start Loving Yourself (Again?)





It's crazy that we live in a time where love is measured by how many " Likes" we get on Instagram,

 or based on someone else inability to love you;  or even contingent on how well we are doing at life at the moment.  It's heartbreaking that we do this to ourselves everyday, it's almost a norm to not feel good about ourselves. This topic has been on my mind for a while now and I have been inspired to write this piece soo many times, but finally I've gotten around to it. Before I start mentioning some tips on how to start loving yourself (again) I want to give a little bit of a breakdown. Let's start with the idea of America and before you start thinking I'm referring to something political I'm not. I'm actually referring to what seems to be the culture here, we are soo obsessed with the idea of success that on our climb to the top we forget who we are as individuals.  For those of you who don't know me I'm very big on mental health and I think it's important for people to feel good about themselves.
With that being said let's get into these tips on how to start loving yourself (again?)


1. STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS: 
comparing yourself to others is the devil!! When you compare yourself to others it will literally eat at you from the inside out, it's not healthy and the information you're receiving is not always accurate. A lot of the times we like to look at other people's accomplishments and think to ourselves why we don't have the same thing they do and honestly the truth is you will get everything you need in your own time. I too have had my moments when I look at other bloggers and I see the great things they are doing and I wonder to myself "when will I get to that point." But then I always come back to this central idea "whats for is for me" and honestly that idea goes a long way. "What's for me is for me" also translate to "move at your own pace", or "your journey is exactly that, YOURS!" So let's stop comparing ourselves to other people because we all should know "everything that glitters ain't always gold."

2. SPEND SOME ALONE TIME WITH YOURSELF: 
I know this may sound like a crazy idea but honestly I find it works alot for me, being alone with my own thoughts has been very rewarding. The best way to know yourself is to be alone with yourself, now I'm not saying to completely isolate yourself from the world (unless it works then go for it) but spending alone times comes in different ways. For example I usually sit in my room and I let my thoughts roam through my head, or I'll even go outside for a walk and admire the things around me. (I usually end those alone times with ice cream, but that's just me) Or you can simply just go outing by yourself. Spending time by yourself helps with the development of your personality and interest, and not only that but it also makes you more innovative. So if you're looking to make that connection reading tip #1 (above) that's where these two ideas correlate. (career wise)

3. ACCEPT WHAT YOU CANNOT CHANGE: 
To me this idea is a big one because we get sooo bent out of shape about situations that we cannot change which leads to us doubting ourselves. The situations that end on a negative note always hurt more and in typical human nature we think about how bad we are, or how could we have changed the end result. Honestly some things were going to happen whether you did something wrong or not and those situations are apart of life. We're not always going to be able to predict or even wish for a happy outcome and that's what life teaches us. That's how we grow as individuals, not all of our interactions are going to be good. Think about it if we lived in a world where everything was good all the time we would never be challenged, there would be no standards, we need complicated interactions that challenge our person, that make us, that push us, we need things to make us uncomfortable so that we can grow. I don't want to go into a rant about this idea, but everything cannot be perfect, it just can't.

 4. FORGIVE YOUR PAST SELF: 
 !! CAUTION WARNING!!  Some realness is coming right now...
THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT !! We need to forgive ourselves for the mistakes that we made in our past, we cannot change what we did; we can only move forward with a better foot. As humans we are always growing and changing and in order to do that we would have had to commit a few crimes ourselves (not in the literal meaning..but maybe that too..??) Either way dwelling on the past in general will eat at you just as much as comparing yourself to other people. We all have a past and it's best to leave it there..IN THE PAST! You need to make room for new things to happen, for new blessings.

5. START TELLING YOURSELF WHAT YOU LOVE ABOUT YOURSELF: 
It's really as simple as it sounds. I'm really into keeping a journal and writing down all my ideas, I urge others to write as well. It can be a very freeing experience and it gets you to look inside yourself and get that conversation started. When you say it out loud you give it truth and you make it real, and if it's real then It Is So. You can either compliment yourself with writing or you can say it out loud, give it some force! So I ask what do you love about yourself...?

6. REMOVE NEGATIVE INFLUENCES (PEOPLE )FROM YOUR LIFE: 
We don't like to admit it but sometimes the people around us are holding us back from reaching our full potential. You attract the energy you hang around, so if you are hanging around negative people chances are you'll always be in a position for negative things to find you. It's such a rewarding thing to be around like minded people, individuals that share the same vision as you do. Surround yourself with people who are on your level and above, make those authentic relationships, share knowledge and make connections. Anything that promotes your personal growth is worth it, so out with the old and in with the new. Now that's not to say that you should go around telling all your friends you can't be friends with them anymore, but the people you meet that are like minded spend a little more time with them. Your friends should be supporting you and if they aren't then maybe you should be seeing less of them?

7.  DO THE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO/GET OUTSIDE YOUR COMFORT ZONE:
it's really as simple as that, if you receive a call from your friends and they want to go shopping at the mall but you rather stay inside the house and watch Amazon Prime movies then do it! (Perhaps I'm guilty of loving to stay in and watch movies lol)  Be okay with saying "no" and be okay with saying no alot lol. You'll never be truly happy doing something you honestly don't want to do. In fact you can even spend that time doing something completely different, something out of your comfort zone. Now let's try the scenario again, your best friend calls you up and says lets go out to eat, but instead you want to try a Zuma class that's starting in an hour! DO THE ZUMA CLASS!! Let's also take into account that you have a fear of others seeing you dance because you don't think you're a good dancer, annnnnd you've been trying to get your friends to do this class with you for months and they wouldn't. Just go without them and step outside your comfort zone, you'll be amazed at what you can do.

8. TRACK YOUR PROGRESS:
This is probably one of the more rewarding parts of this process, as I mentioned before I love writing and jotting down my thoughts. If might be even helpful to write down all the things that you've done that you normally wouldn't have done. Writing a journal about all the times you've conquered these tasks really helps, it gives you that extra boost that you need. It's just like anything else in life that you are tracking, the proof is in the pudding. It gives you a sense of accomplishment and that drives us to create more and do more.


* My Closing Thoughts: 


Sometimes we get lost in the sauce of life like careers, relationships, friendships, family etc and that's why it was very important for me to write this blog post because on my journey to finding myself and loving myself I needed to try different things to help me along the way. I always say to my friends and people who I encounter you can't get through life without yourself, or it's very important for you to feel good about yourself because when you do you can accomplish alot more. I really hope this finds someone out there and if so comment below your thoughts. I wanna hear your stories, let's share knowledge and remember to always strive to be the best version of yourself.

With Much Love, 
LoveBetterxo <3 



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